What Have You Learned

The news arrived. The judge was giving full custody to my ex, I was given no visitation unless it was approved by my ex-husband. I sat in stunned silence. I would never see my children again. My mind began to race. The words quietly, but clearly exploded inside my head: RUN! I took my children and left the state. When I thought we were safe, we changed our names and set up house. Three weeks later, I found myself sitting in jail, while my children became wards of the SRS! I was in shock, I wondered how my life could have taken such a turn for the worse. I was just a mother and I didn't deserve to be treated like a criminal.



I looked in my Bible and found a typed message from the Almighty God. My hands shook as I read the message! "Look Back and see what you have learned? God has Spoken!!"



I had been a wife, mother, and daughter that was admired and loved. Little did I know that my life was going to take such a dramatic turn that God would give me supernatural typed messages in order to help me survive. Everyone, including my parents, church, friends and society turned away from me because I fell in love with a woman. I couldn't believe what was happening! I was attacked by my ex-husband in front of my former pastor, and followed by the entire Southern Baptist church, who were on a mission to prove that I was gay. Now I was in jail because I was a mother who loved her children and fought for equal visitation rights.



The supernatural messages gave me hope that I wasn't alone fighting against the world. They were messages of encouragement. They were letters that directed my fight against the injustices a person faces when they are gay. They were words of love that gave me strength that I was never alone because the Holy Spirit was guarding my weak human nature with strength that was greater than any human's ability to endure.



It was a paranormal experience that gave beyond this world's ability to comprehend, because my fight was not just against man but against the evil forces in the spiritual world. I read the messages again and again applying everything I learned to the experiences I went through. I was astonished as I began to understand why I needed to look back and see what I learned. I realized that it wasn't God's punishment for my sins that did this to me, it was people! People being guided by an unseen evil force.



My understanding made me look at what happened to me differently. I began to see truth unfold and my world changing from me being in charge to God navigating me through an intricate maze that would open my mind to a new way of viewing the world. A world corrupted by evil spirits.



I began to see injustice in child custody, divorce court and even in what kind of people were in jail. God opened up my mind and let me see how our society oppresses people in the courts, because they are no longer following God, but Satan. I found that the injustice was being waged against the homeless, poor and abused of our society.



Millions of questions rose in my mind as the Holy Spirit interpreted each of the conflicts I went through. It was as if God was exposing our world and revealing to me that I was in a life game. A destiny that was geared to bring me to the light of a new understanding about my world. A path in life where I would learn the difference between good and bad.



Ever since the beginning of time people have been going through tragedy that led them through hard life experiences. This answers the most difficult question of all: Why was I born? What is my purpose?



These messages made me see why bad things happen to people, from child custody fights to why wars occur. It opened my eyes to why we suffer with diseases, poverty and natural disasters. It parted the darkness of deception and let me see my real enemy, Satan. More importantly it let me see into the invisible world that surrounds our world. A Spirit world of good and evil spirits. Evil spirits that entice men into committing sin. Sin that corrupts the 'thought life' of good men into doing evil. Men who have denied faith in God and given into Satan.



The Old Testament describes in detail how people's sin corrupted the world and made it evil. Cain killed Abel over jealousy. Joseph's brothers sold him to pharaoh because of jealousy. Good kings turned against God because of pride. The Bible reveals what happens when you murder and you give into sin for selfish reasons.



We must play the great game of life wisely. We need to understand the purpose of this world and discern the difference between God and Satan. This is the reason why I needed the messages, because up until now I had been taught in the church that being gay was wrong. I needed God to give me the power to fight back against those who used the Bible as a means to control people for their own will. I needed God to tell me that He made me this way!



Isaiah 59: 4-8, "You go to court, but you do not have justice on your side. You depend on lies to win your case. You carry out your plans to hurt others. The evil plots you make are as deadly as the eggs of a poisonous snake. Crush an egg, out comes a snake! But your plots will do you no good-they are as useless as clothing made of cobwebs! You are always planning something evil, and you can hardly wait to do it. You never hesitate to murder innocent people. You leave ruin and destruction wherever you go, and no one is safe when you are around. Everything you do is unjust. You follow a crooked path, and no one who walks that path will ever be safe."



God's truth is revealed when people are separated from the thinking of men and they see for themselves what is right and what is wrong through life changing experiences. This can only happen when we understand that our world is corrupted by evil.



Today we live in a society that has forgotten God. We don't understand the difference between right and wrong. We don't seek the spiritual part of life and as a result our world is self-destructing, because evil has been given the power to flourish and grow. From global warming that can put our world into an ice-age, to wars, natural disasters and evil people who hurt others in order to get ahead, people have lost the ability to know right from wrong. When we are blind to how our world teaches us, then we become defenseless to Satan's weapons of deceit.



Isaiah 59:14&15a, "Justice is driven away, and right cannot come near. Truth stumbles in the public square, and honesty finds no place there. There is so little honesty that anyone who stops doing evil finds himself the victim of crime."



We need to gain understanding over why bad things happen to people by looking back and seeing what we have learned. We must hold onto God and love and listen to the voice of good.



I suffered injustice through the court system because people were not listening to the voice of God. God took me and opened my eyes to injustice so I would not be deceived into following the crowd and doing wrong. God taught me the difference between right and wrong. Most of all He gave me the strength to stand and fight even when people did me wrong.



Isaiah 59:15b-17, "The Lord has seen this, and he is displeased that there is no justice. He is astonished to see that there is no one to help the oppressed. So he will use his own power to rescue them and to win the victory. He will wear justice like a coat of armor and saving power like a helmet. He will clothe himself with the strong desire to set things right and to punish and avenge the wrongs that people suffer."



God has a way of working things out. The judge who heard my children's custody case, cut the phone lines in the court house. Apparently he couldn't remember his combination for dialing out when making long distance calls. He wasn't charged for the vandalism, but he was removed from office. This opened the door to a new judge who heard my case and quickly gave me a fair custody arrangement.



"God has spoken my ways are not human ways, trust in Me!" The typed words gave meaning to the purpose behind my suffering. It gave me the strength to see my world in two dimensions, I was in a fight against evil. A revelation that would give my life purpose and give me a voice to tell others that our world is more than what you can see.